Thursday, November 30, 2006

Friday Night Running Humor

I'm sure most have read this but it's funnny!

You know you are a runner...
• when your spouse/coworkers/children/neighbors complain about how cranky you are after you missed your run
• you know the definitions fartlek, tempo run, taper, and glycogen stores and use them regularly
• when you find that you have to think of your run schedule to remember what day of the week it is
• when you have a folder for running webpages in your bookmarks
• when you can name at least 3 writers of running blogs
• when you wake up thinking about today's run and go to sleep thinking about tomorrow's run
• when you run up to a red light and think "Man, I wish I didn't have to stop!" instead of "Good, I want a break!"
• when you drive your route after your runs to find out how far you went
• when you drive the route to your next race days (or weeks) in advance
• when you ask people (who didn't run the race and may or may not be runners) if they want to ride with you while you drive the course of the race you just did and give them commentary of the race while doing so
• when you dream about running
• when giving directions, you can give the tenths or hundreths of a mile ("turn right in .38 miles")
• when you use the words "easy" and "long run" in the same sentence
• when you continue running despite the fact that when you blink your eyelashes stick together because they are collecting ice and snow
• when you spend more time on sites like this than you do work
• when you cross the finish line of a marathon and you start considering where/when the next one will be
• when you can say "fartlek" without a single hint of a laugh
• you spend your free time reading nutrition labels and race results
• when you are running a race and your calves are cramping and your knees are aching and your lungs are burning but you still find yourself thinking, "This is fun!"
• when you'd rather run than watch TV
• when you have an exact 'prestart routine' for all runs: the same stretches in the same place for the same amount of time before you take off
• when you notice that the only footsteps in the snow are yours and yours from yesterday
• when you leave the New Year's Eve party early because you have a race in the morning
• when you have to drive for 20 miles before you find a road you haven't run on
• when you get out of your car at red lights and run around it a few times
• when you buy Gatorade and Epsom salt by the truck load
• when you have your race schedule set out for 5 years in advance but can’t remember if you scheduled to work the next day or not
• when you pee in public when you aren't drunk
• when your big date each week is the date you have with a good pair of running shoes and the road
• when it is suggested that you give up running for Lent

I like the blog part and I'll add:
• when your running crap takes up this much space

• when you run more miles than you drive

Feel free to add-on!

Thank goodness it's Guinness time...

Have a nice weekend!